IN THEIR FROZEN BODIES

Q: what are we doing this afternoon?

A: finding a stilled but living god, climbing into its mouth or eyes and taking everything we can find.

ROT is maybe a setting/hack/adventure I will release this year (this year? 12 months? WHEN IT'S DONE, I GUESS).

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Q: what will it look like?

A: digest size. short and concise. pixelated art.

Q: rules?

A: hacked Lamentations of the Flame Princess.

Q: hacked how?

A: mostly wanking with the classes. Playsheets. About 3x as many classes. Taking the simplicity of something like B/X and bringing it into line with the power curve of 4e. I think.

I stole some questions from Jeff R.

Q: What is the deal with my cleric's religion?

A: you go make friends with a god and they give you spells. sometimes they come with you and help out, like a mildly malevolent Totoro or something from Where the Wild Things Are.

Q: Where can we go to buy standard equipment?

A: Anywhere. It's like, highly populated and everyone has a ton of junk. Hermits in caves or holes have junk like door spikes to sell you. Wandering Porter Johns or Janes have been reworked to carry tons of stuff and make a great deal of profit selling you whatever their last (now dead?) client had them port around.

Q: Where can we go to get platemail custom fitted for this monster I just befriended?

A: can you not just do that yourself? since most of the people here might count as monsters, custom jobs rarely make economic sense, but there's sure to be someone in town.

Q: Who is the mightiest wizard in the land? The greatest warrior?

A: Highly disputed. These questions start wars. You're in the land of 777,777 heroes, after all.

Q: Who is the richest person in the land?

A: Whichever of the mightiest of heroes has spent the least of their war chest.

Q: Where can we go to get some magical healing?

A: Oh man (or woman), anywhere. Throw some coins into a river and there's sure to be a talking fish that'll set you right for a favor.

Q: Where can we go to get cures for the following conditions: poison, disease, curse, level drain, lycanthropy, polymorph, alignment change, death, undeath?

A: It is offensive to suggest lycanthropy or undeath are to be cured, bigot. Everything else, see above, though the favors get more costly.

Q: Is there a magic guild my MU belongs to or that I can join in order to get more spells?

A: there is the Lodge for wizardy types, the Eye for warlocky types.

Q: Where can I find an alchemist, sage or other expert NPC?

A: In any town.

Q: Where can I hire mercenaries?

A: Assume everyone is or was a mercenary.

Q: Is there any place on the map where swords are illegal, magic is outlawed or any other notable hassles from Johnny Law?

A: No. In fact, the idea is anathema.

Q: Which way to the nearest tavern?

A: Anywhere. All the towns move around. Most of towns are really just an enormous drinking party with a bunch of hangers on.

Q: What monsters are terrorizing the countryside sufficiently that if I kill them I will become famous?

A: You’re looking for other heroes, probably.

Q: Are there any wars brewing I could go fight?

A: Constantly. Assume that one will break out by the second or third session.

Q: How about gladiatorial arenas complete with hard-won glory and fabulous cash prizes?

A: Go to a tavern/town/drinking party. Start a fight. Win. Impress whoever is buying drinks.

Q: Are there any secret societies with sinister agendas I could join and/or fight?

A: Not really. The Tychginian Massive wants to destroy the universe, but everyone knows about them and no one seems worried. The Horde (mind-synced, psychic halflings) are probably up to something.

Q: What is there to eat around here?

A: Hope you like meat. Probably from something sentient.

Q: Any legendary lost treasures I could be looking for?

A: Go to the Quiet Spires and loot the near-motionless body of a god sinking into the Rot. They’re full of them, or at least, that’s what everyone says. There’s also the ruined Castle in the Lake, fortress of the Brass Emperor (now long ascended to godhood) if you want big shiny weapons and armor. Or the Hospital of Christ Repulsive, Prince Rot if you want magic or weird, probably cursed but terrifying armor and weapons. And then the Grey Temple and Ordru Vem if you don’t mind the psychic probing of the Grey Elves. And also the black catwalks of the forge city/machine planet of the dwarves, Ghaz’sham.

Q: Where is the nearest dragon or other monster with Type H treasure?

A: probably out drinking. Eyeball everyone at the party for scales. Look for whoever is getting their ass kissed the most.

attribution: i did the art. and yes, I know there are numerous technical problems